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This must be the most popular question asked in offices around the world today. Normally the answers are “not much” or something big and exciting. It seems that if you aren’t doing one or the other, it isn’t worth mentioning. I personally think it is a shame that we seem to only be able to answer in one extreme or the other.
My favourite answer to that question used to be “spending time with my wife” now it is “spending time with the family.” When did people start deeming these things not exciting enough to talk about? When did people think they weren’t worth mentioning? When did people get embarrassed to say these things?
I live for and love the weekends. My weekends are usually the best part of my week. Because I enjoy time with my family so much, I have started scaling back what I do outside of work to make sure I get as much time with them as I possibly can.
What we are doing isn’t important to me. It’s the spending the time together away from other things and distractions, which is the most important thing to me. Just spending time with my family is doing something. When you are asked if you are doing something, you don’t have to be doing an event or going somewhere in order to be doing something.
Don’t get me wrong I do like going out and doing things, but they are always more special if I am doing them with my family. Sharing an experience and having a joint memory is so much better than sharing a story later with someone who wasn’t there to experience it with you.
I hope I can encourage other people to be loud and proud about just enjoying spending time with friends and family over weekends. Don’t feel the rush to have to show off about what you are doing on a weekend, don’t feel like you have to. The truth in many situations is that the ones showing off would rather have the situation you have.
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One thing I am is very proud about the way my family do life. I always want to shout it to the hilltops. I want to do this not because I think I am better than anyone else but because what we do brings me joy. From the way we organise our time to the practical and emotional support we give each other, there isn’t any area that I am not proud of. Yes we are always looking to do things better and ways to improve but it’s that want to look after each other in the best way possible, which makes me so happy.
The sad thing I find in today’s world, that it is so hard to be proud. When you act proud for some reason it feels like you are rubbing other peoples faces in it and saying that you are better than other people, that your life choices are better than there’s. It seems to be hard to have a good day and celebrate that good day when others around you are having bad days. I hate that we live in a world where someone’s success can make another person feel inadequate or a failure. I don’t want to celebrate something good to make others feel worse, all I want to do is share good news.
Not better than anyone else
When I celebrate achievement I’m not trying to say I’m the best or say that I am doing things in the right way and that everyone should be doing this. I am simply saying – this is working for me and I am happy it is working for me. Yes I want happiness for other people and would love them to get success from doing things that have worked for me but I’m not saying it’s the only way or better than anyone else’s.
It feels like I am constantly having to censor myself, which I don’t like doing. It’s like when you have a conversation and someone says something negative like ‘sometimes I feel like strangling my kids’ you feel compelled for some reason to go along with it and agree even if you don’t feel this way.
When did it get this hard?
I just don’t know when it got this hard to be proud. I think in the modern age we are too busy trying not to upset anyone that we stop being happy ourselves, which in the long run just makes everyone unhappy. I hope that in years to come it becomes easier to be proud, as I never want to be anything other than proud.
Regular readers of my blog will have noticed that I haven’t posted for a while. I am glad to tell you that this has all been because of this bundle of joy came in to our lives two weeks ago:
To say that we are over the moon with our amazing, beautiful girl is an under statement.
A lot of opportunities have probably passed me by in life but it is amazing to think that her potential is unlimited and the possibilities for what she can do with her life are endless. I am so excited to be part of her life and go on the journey with her, as she learns and discovers this world and her place in it.
I think being a parent or raising a child is one of the most incredible things you can do and I can’t wait to raise this little one. I know I will get things wrong and she will get things wrong, but I know I’m always going to try my hardest for this little one in every aspect of her life.
If you are ever feeling sad I think being around a baby or looking after a baby can get you out of any bad or sad mood. Being able to experience the world again through the eyes of a child is a wonderful thing.
I know our girl is going to bring our family so much happiness, I just hope I can bring her as much happiness as she will bring me to be her parent. One of the proudest things I will ever be is her dad.
Regardless of whether you have your own children or not, lets all go out and be parents. Lets care for others and go out every day to try and make a positive impact on the lives of others, as I think these are some of the most important traits of being a parent.
Blogs will return to normal from now I hope, but I just couldn’t start blogging again without sharing the news of one of the most incredible things to happen to me.
Following on from my recent blog titled ‘Finding Your Niche’, today I want to talk about ‘Being Proud.’ In ‘Finding Your Niche’ I talked about how it is important to find your passion and pursue it, well now I want to talk about being proud of your passions.
I must start by saying, as I write this I have been listening to and singing along to “Let it Go” from the Disney film Frozen whilst being called a wonderful loser by my wife. I have no shame in saying as a 30 year old man that I think it’s a great song to sing along to.
I think being proud of our hobbies and interest makes us happier people. I think we scrutinize and pigeon hole each other far too much in this world. As a people I think we feel the need to either hide, or have to justify our hobbies and interests.
Some people are fortunate enough to turn their hobbies and interests in to paying work or companies and in the main, I think these are the people that aren’t ashamed of the things the like.
I hate how people conform and like things, just because they think it is the thing to do or will make them cool. I also feel sorry to those that have to hide things to avoid being bullied in school. I think it is at school that we make these decisions of what to like & what to hide and it is these decisions that dictate our future life and how we handle it in adulthood.
We also live in a world today when posting on social media or telling your friends about how you miss your wife is seen as making you less of a man. You are given your sex at birth you don’t need to do anything else to claim or show you are a man; it’s on your birth certificate.
I would love to encourage anyone who reads this blog to be loud and proud. To make today the day that they started owning what they were about. I will start: I love my wife she is the best thing to happen to me, I am a Christian, I like Arsenal, I like TV and I like Pro-Wrestling.
I couldn’t care about being the coolest person as that is not a competition I want to win or be apart of. I want to win the competition of being the happiest person on earth, because just remember fitting in and being cool won’t win you the happiest person on earth award.