What a night

Embed from Getty Images

Last night I was working on the audio description team for my local football team Plymouth Argyle, as they won their Football League 2 playoff semi-final against Portsmouth, to win a place in the final at Wembley on May 30th. After commentating on the team through years of downfall from the Championship to League 2 it was great to finally have a night of success at our ground Home Park.

It has been twenty years since we were last at Wembley and our fans are dreaming of Wembley success again this year. Very rarely is our home ground a sellout for a game and that is a shame, as it is always such a great atmosphere when it is.

I was there

The game last night wasn’t a classic by any stretch, but that didn’t matter in a way. When that final whistle blew nobody cared about how good the game was, everyone was just rejoicing and joining together in a proud moment for the team, the fans and the city. It was a night that will be looked back on in years to come, where everyone there will be able to say I was there that night Argyle won their way to Wembley.

It’s the collective experience that makes football I think. A ton of fans, in one space, living through the emotions of the game, for one common cause. People may not have known the people sat around them last night, but they joined in together cheering the team on and I am sure although they might not have got their names, they will remember their faces in their minds when they look back on this day.

Something that isn’t tangible

When so many people in one space are happy, you can just feel something, something that isn’t tangible but it is there. A feel good feeling just goes right through you and for a moment all of the worries in life don’t exist and you are allowed a moment of pure jubilation.

I am hoping beyond any hope that we win at Wembley but whatever happens nobody will be able to take last night and its place in history away. Thanks to the players and everyone who attended last night’s game, you made the experience. Through all of us we all have a reason to be happy and optimistic today, last night something was accomplished that will hopefully lead to greater things for the players, fans and city.

Advertisements

Treasuring moments in life

Embed from Getty Images

Life can move at a pretty fast pace at times, if you couple this with the throwaway nature of todays society, it means that many amazing moments in life are too quickly forgotten and lost.

Feeling Valued

Yesterday I had a moment I want to treasure and hold on to. Yesterday in the mail I received a copy of ‘the Journal of Dementia Care’ one of the leading publications for dementia care professionals in the UK. In said journal there was an article by me that they had published. To get that recognition, to know that they valued my voice and my words to put me in it, was an incredible feeling and to be in a publication featuring articles from many professionals and big organisations in the field of dementia, was just mind blowing.

It got me thinking about the moments in my life recently that I want to treasure forever, like my daughter learning to pull herself up to her feet, or listening to my wife sing. I am so fortunate in my life to have so many moments I want to treasure, that I don’t want to forget them or take them for granted, as I know it is not the same for everyone.

Moments that are big to you

It is also important to not just treasure the big moments but the moments that are big to you. The moments that put a smile on your face and really bring joy to your heart, regardless of what they are, we need to live in a world where we have no shame in being proud of what we are proud of, not a world where we are made to feel little or less amazing than the next person because we choose to treasure different things.

A moment to treasure can get you through a tough day, tough week or tough year. The power of a moment to treasure is something, which we need to value and appreciate. These special moments can motivate you on to even bigger and better things in your life if you to choose to use them.

The good moments in life are the ones that give you hope in the bad times and make this life worthwhile. I am already excited for my next one and to when I can start looking back at all of them in later life, remembering the rich life experience I have had.

Proud

Embed from Getty Images

One thing I am is very proud about the way my family do life. I always want to shout it to the hilltops. I want to do this not because I think I am better than anyone else but because what we do brings me joy. From the way we organise our time to the practical and emotional support we give each other, there isn’t any area that I am not proud of. Yes we are always looking to do things better and ways to improve but it’s that want to look after each other in the best way possible, which makes me so happy.

The sad thing I find in today’s world, that it is so hard to be proud. When you act proud for some reason it feels like you are rubbing other peoples faces in it and saying that you are better than other people, that your life choices are better than there’s. It seems to be hard to have a good day and celebrate that good day when others around you are having bad days. I hate that we live in a world where someone’s success can make another person feel inadequate or a failure. I don’t want to celebrate something good to make others feel worse, all I want to do is share good news.

Not better than anyone else

When I celebrate achievement I’m not trying to say I’m the best or say that I am doing things in the right way and that everyone should be doing this. I am simply saying – this is working for me and I am happy it is working for me. Yes I want happiness for other people and would love them to get success from doing things that have worked for me but I’m not saying it’s the only way or better than anyone else’s.

It feels like I am constantly having to censor myself, which I don’t like doing. It’s like when you have a conversation and someone says something negative like ‘sometimes I feel like strangling my kids’ you feel compelled for some reason to go along with it and agree even if you don’t feel this way.

When did it get this hard?

I just don’t know when it got this hard to be proud. I think in the modern age we are too busy trying not to upset anyone that we stop being happy ourselves, which in the long run just makes everyone unhappy. I hope that in years to come it becomes easier to be proud, as I never want to be anything other than proud.

Happiness isn’t easy

Embed from Getty Images

Sometimes when you’re happy, you are so caught up with that incredible feeling that you can’t think of a reason that could make people unhappy or why people can’t be happy. Happiness I think is one of the easiest things to take for granted and assume is easy to achieve.

Just because happiness comes easy for you, it doesn’t mean that it comes easy for everyone. If happiness was easy to achieve for everyone, then everyone would be happy. There are lots of people out there who wished they had happiness and for many it isn’t a choice they are making not to be happy.

Pressure

There seems to be such a crushing pressure put on people in today’s society for them to be happy, that it leads to many people having to fake it and pretend to be happy just to fit in or to be seen as normal. Then there are also those that want to be happy so much that they will pretend to be, as they want it so much.

When you want to be happy and you try your hardest to be just to fail and not find happiness, it can push you further in to a sadder place than what you were before you started on your pursuit of happiness. Failing at anything can be saddening event but when that thing you fail at is finding happiness then is a very low place to be in.

Society

Society tells us that there are many events in life that should make us happy. Passing exams, getting a job, having money, travelling, friends, family, getting a house etc. I could go on and on, as there are so many things that we are told should be happy things and make us happy. A word to everyone reading this blog, these things don’t make everyone happy and there is nothing wrong with you if you don’t find happiness from any or some of these things. The key to happiness is to find what truly makes you happy and not worry about what doesn’t make you happy.

So much happens to all of us over our lives and it can be the things that happen to us, that stop us from being happy and are so hard to not let affect you. If you see someone who isn’t a ‘happy person’ and you don’t know why, try to stop and remember this – different things affect different people in different ways so trying to work out why someone is unhappy or why something would make someone unhappy is quite difficult at times for you and for them.

The responsibility I think we all have is to not add to the pressure people feel in today’s world to be happy. Lets not look at people as different or strange if they aren’t happy. Lets be an ear and a friend, let’s start caring for each other and see where that gets us.

Happy Birthday

Embed from Getty Images

So the day after my anniversary, I celebrated my 31st birthday. The sun was shining (which is rare in the UK in April) and due to it coinciding with the Easter weekend, we had a public holiday so I didn’t have to go in to work.

My wife gave me the most amazing and thoughtful birthday (or should I say birthdays a it stretched over two days), which were days of adventure, fun and time together, away from the stresses and strains of life. It was a time to be happy and I think that is an important thing on a birthday. I think there is a reason people wish you ‘happy birthday’, they want it to be a happy day for you and I can say mine certainly was.

Birthdays for many can be a sad event. Some fear growing older, some use it to lament their current situation in life, some use it to look back at sad events in the last year and some use it to feel sad about the future and what it holds. I think some people think: what have I got to be happy about? It is because of some of these reasons mentioned, that some people choose not to mark or celebrate their birthday and would rather it was forgotten.

An Important day

I want to say that your birthday is a special and important day. Your birthday is the anniversary of the day you came in to this world and started making an impact on it, as believe you me – we all have in our own ways. Your birthday is the anniversary of the day that someone or some people cared enough to bring you in to this world and I think that is something which shouldn’t be underestimated or made to feel small.

Your birthday doesn’t need to be a reflection or a look to the future, it can just be about that one day. If you feel things aren’t going your way in life, it can be a day just to forget about them and enjoy yourself. Even if you are in the midst of a tough situation, never feel like you can’t celebrate your birthday or feel bad for doing so. I personally think the world needs a bit more happiness in it and we should use any chance we have to bring a bit more happiness to it.

What you make it

I am happy for my life and I am happy for my time here on earth. I am so thankful for it all and want to celebrate it any chance I get. A birthday can be a day to look at the world and life anew, a day to show others you love them, a day to be thankful, but above all a birthday is what you make it.

Birthdays shouldn’t be judged on number of presents or money spent on the day, they should be judged on enjoyment of the day. Happiness is contagious and birthdays are a great way to spread happiness, so lets make them the happiest that we can.

After responding to all my birthday wishes on Facebook from friends across the globe I put a post up on my page. In that post I asked my Facebook friends that wanted to get me anything for my birthday to instead of getting me a present, to download by book on dementia care, the story of my life caring for my mum. So I would like to extend that to all my brilliant followers and readers of this blog. It would mean the world to me if you made a purchase or helped me spread the word about the book, by posting a link to it on your social media feeds. Below is the link to the book and I would like to take this opportunity to thank all that have supported me in any way over my life, I am thankful for it all:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Unbreakable-Bond-Adam-Sibley-ebook/dp/B00UM6ATBW

Being Proud

Following on from my recent blog titled ‘Finding Your Niche’, today I want to talk about ‘Being Proud.’ In ‘Finding Your Niche’ I talked about how it is important to find your passion and pursue it, well now I want to talk about being proud of your passions.

I must start by saying, as I write this I have been listening to and singing along to “Let it Go” from the Disney film Frozen whilst being called a wonderful loser by my wife. I have no shame in saying as a 30 year old man that I think it’s a great song to sing along to.

I think being proud of our hobbies and interest makes us happier people. I think we scrutinize and pigeon hole each other far too much in this world. As a people I think we feel the need to either hide, or have to justify our hobbies and interests.

Some people are fortunate enough to turn their hobbies and interests in to paying work or companies and in the main, I think these are the people that aren’t ashamed of the things the like.

I hate how people conform and like things, just because they think it is the thing to do or will make them cool. I also feel sorry to those that have to hide things to avoid being bullied in school. I think it is at school that we make these decisions of what to like & what to hide and it is these decisions that dictate our future life and how we handle it in adulthood.

We also live in a world today when posting on social media or telling your friends about how you miss your wife is seen as making you less of a man. You are given your sex at birth you don’t need to do anything else to claim or show you are a man; it’s on your birth certificate.

I would love to encourage anyone who reads this blog to be loud and proud. To make today the day that they started owning what they were about. I will start: I love my wife she is the best thing to happen to me, I am a Christian, I like Arsenal, I like TV and I like Pro-Wrestling.

I couldn’t care about being the coolest person as that is not a competition I want to win or be apart of. I want to win the competition of being the happiest person on earth, because just remember fitting in and being cool won’t win you the happiest person on earth award.

Happy and content

I think the people who are truly happy in life are those that can smile through their own contentness (I know there is no such word). I think people confuse being content with doing nothing and just letting life pass you by, but I don’t think that is what content is.

I think being content is about being happy from within and not needing events to happen around you to make you happy. Lets not find our happiness in inanimate objects and events, let’s find happiness inside of us and in each other.

Now we are all guilty of looking at the lives of other people and thinking that they lead cool lives and do cool things, but just because it seems cool, is it? Are they happy? Would you actually enjoy that life? Through knowing someone on social media or through the press you just hear the highlights, not the real life.

Whilst you’re busy wishing you had someone else’s life – so are they! Or someone else will be wishing they had your life. For many people happiness is a façade or something they feel pressured to be, “I have everything so I should be happy” they might think to themselves. Happiness shouldn’t be something you feel guilted (again not sure if that’s a word) in to feeling.

If you do anything for long enough it becomes routine and this is when if you are not content and happy, what made you happy to start with won’t any more and you will be searching for something different or something better. Don’t waste your time searching for the next high, start searching for internal happiness instead.

Don’t look down your nose people or call them boring just because they may do a 9 – 5 in an office and watch the same TV show every night, applaud them for being happy if that is what they are. We need to stop celebrating achievements and start celebrating happiness.

Success isn’t happiness but happiness is success.